Here are my comments on the book:
What can you do in four seconds? How much can you really achieve? According to Peter Bregman, CEO of Bregman Partners, Inc., a company that strengthens leadership in people and in organizations, four seconds is all it takes to solve a lot of life’s problems. Bregman outlines an innumerable list of strategies on becoming more productive, setting goals, and creating better relationships. Some of the points taken away are:
1. Before engaging in an impeding argument, just take four seconds to breathe to stop yourself from saying something that you may regret or that will create an undesired outcome. “Four seconds-one breath-is all it takes to stop yourself from a counter-productive knee-jerk reaction. And four seconds is all it takes to make a more intentional, strategic choice that’s more likely to get you where you want to go.“
2. A recurring message that I see/read from successful individuals and books, this one as well, is that focus is one of the biggest factors behind their success. Despite what background you come from whether its social, economical, racial, or political, we all only have 24 hours in a day. Successful people stay don’t squander their time; they stay focused on what matters to them. “Identify the things you want to spend your time doing-or the things that you and your manager decide are the most valuable use of your time- and spend your time doing those things. The rest takes care of itself. [Bregman has] found that five major areas of focus are about the limit before your efforts get diluted.“
3. Demanding something from someone when you lack power over them is a pointless, downward spiralling conversation. Try a different and softer approach; you may be surprised at how a gentler touch can get you what you want. “Grabbing power, especially when you don’t have it, is unpredictable, feels bad to both parties, and is bullying. The collateral damage to the relationship is almost always high. When you are interacting with someone who has power over you, don’t engage in a power struggle by issuing demands and threats. Instead, appeal to their generosity. If asked respectfully, people will often happily do the very thing they’re refusing to do when they think you’re trying to push them.“
4. What’s the best way to get out of a surprise verbal confrontation? Ask the aggressor questions to find out about the root of their anger. “Whenever you’re taken by surprise or feel attacked by someone, resist the impulse to act defensively. Instead ask a question. It is much more likely that the situation will be diffused, and you’ll save the time wasted arguing and recriminating.“.
By Ryan Lee
Check out the book here: